Healing from COVID-19

We can all agree that the past three years have not been the highlight reel of our life. But seriously, all kidding aside, this pandemic has been the worst thing that mankind has had to go through. Not only has it had an enormous impact physically on the world (by this I mean the ginormous death toll, families separated/displaced, entire job sectors being shut down), but it has also dented our mental health in a way that no other past disaster has. And let’s be honest, the scars that this disaster has given us are not going to leave us. I do not know about you but just thinking about this makes me sad and feel like we are doomed.

However, we have to remember that however angry we get at this mahamari (pandemic); it will not undo the effects that this virus brought on us. Believe me, if I had the chance to go back in time and undo all the changes, I would be the first person to do so in an instant. At the risk of sounding overly pessimistic, I have to add that that is not how life works; what has happened has happened and there is nothing we can do to change or modify it whatsoever. But what we can do is try to move on, heal from such an experience (because all of us, whether we recognize it or not, have been directly or indirectly affected by this pandemic), and adapt to this new way of life. I know, it’s a lot harder than it sounds. And it will be even harder for those who have seen the deadly work of this disease close by. However, like any hard thing, it gets easier with time.

Now, I know that I am no expert at advising how to heal and finally move on from the life-threatening event, but as a fellow friend who prides himself on being something of a life coach, here are some of the things that have helped me in the process of healing and moving on:

• Acknowledge and accept the losses: acknowledge that the COVID-19 pandemic has caused you considerable pain and however difficult that might be, accept it. After all, you don’t heal a wound until you recognize it and determine that it needs your attention. 

• Accept what is, and work towards what you want:  Someone once asked me what is the point of free will if everything is destined in life. I did not know the answer then, but I do now: situations are destined in life, our response to them is not. Therefore, we cannot choose what happens in our life, only how we respond to it. After all, that speech that Rocky gave to his son about life is more accurate than people believe it to be. If you don’t know what I’m talking about, hop on the internet, open YouTube, and watch the first clip that comes up when you type “Rocky speech”. It is definitely worth a watch.

• Define and align yourself to your purpose: If you have not already, define your purpose in life and live according to it. If you already have a purpose in life, revisit it and remind yourself why you are alive on this planet. Amid all this chaos and suffering, one can easily get lost without a purpose; for it is like a compass that will guide you through the thick and thin. When confused, take the step that feel will take you one step closer to your success. Now I know that some of you might not feel the urgent need to define your “why”, but to give you a perspective, defining your purpose is what logotherapy is all about; living a purposeless life would have been adequate for pre-corona time, but in this new era, defining one's purpose is of the utmost importance.

• Develop good habits: Developing good habits has a two-fold function. It gives you a sense of accomplishment, as you know that you are doing the right thing and has the added benefit of effortlessly replacing the bad habits. I know that good habits, unlike bad habits, are not easy to form. But once you cross that 21-day finish line, it will be a piece of cake. And remember to take it one at a time. Slow and steady wins the race. 

• Practice detachment: Detachment is often defined as the “state of being objective or aloof”, which is not true and highly misleading. Detachment is the practice of distancing yourself from that which is not yours, and let’s face it; nothing on this earth is really ours. Now I know that may sound cruel, but thinking that things are ours when they are not, will only bring us suffering when they are taken away from us. 

• Healing is life-long: Lastly, remember that healing is a life-long process and does not have an endpoint. I know this may sound harsh, but remember that no one is perfect. Everyone is improving and improvement is just another fancy way of saying healing. 

• Bonus tip: have a growth mindset instead of a fixed one. Adopting a growth mindset will be highly beneficial as healing is a long process and we are doomed to come across things that we will not be able to do at first, but will be able to do so eventually. A growth mindset will help us enhance the speed of this process. 

Now I know that some of the above steps will be extremely difficult to implement, but I can assure you that implementing them won’t kill you and what doesn’t kill you only makes you stronger. All jokes aside, I am deeply disturbed by how things have turned out in the past year and can only sympathize with those who have been impacted by this pandemic (which includes us all). Who knew the world scenario would turn into a scene from a horror movie (literally!).

Now, I am not saying that what we are going through is good or beneficial in any way, but it is what it is. And just like climbing mountains, the best view in life comes only after the longest climb.